The surgeon I had originally been referred to is no longer my surgeon. A trusted friend and M.D. said I am “NOT” to go near this guy. Or vice versa.
So, looking around town and insurance in network I find there are NO in network Colorectal Surgeons. ALL are “out of network (OON)” for my PPO. I swear the following is what is shown on line with my insurance company as PPO/OON as in Pooh-Pooh’n. If that isn’t a comment I am not sure what is.
The anal ultrasound that was supposed to happen Wednesday is not happening. Even though, I wasn’t going to use the first guy which, he has no way of knowing. He told me and my son his staff would call me Tuesday morning to arrange the Wednesday procedure. I have not heard from them. Maybe they knew I was only going to have the ultrasound. But, the ultrasound is off for now.I have made appointments with two colorectal surgeons. Who ever gets me in first wins. (Or is that who ever gets into me first?) Well, hopefully, either way I win. The earliest at this point is June 4.
Nothing I read about this diagnosis is good. Though, I have to say I am having a difficult time finding any articles dealing with my exact diagnosis. Though, it is pretty clear that rectal cancer is “rare”. How rare, I wonder, is anal cancer of the rectum?
My cell phone is crapping out. I have lost phone numbers, calls, emails, and it won’t even charge. A new one is already on its way. Just glad I had the warranty on it. Otherwise, it would cost me out-of-pocket more than the monthly fee over two years. I am getting to the point that it is taking me everything I have not to roll down my car window and hurl this phone out my car window in front of my moving car just so I can drive over it at a high rate of speed. If only I could feel the crunch of the plastic separating from its unified shield into bits under my tires like a cockroach carapace underfoot.
I am going to have to cover quite a lot of the cost of this whole process because of the whole Pooh Pooh’n problem. What are my choices? Pay out-of-pocket or my ass, as it were. If I do not pay out of my ass in the worst possible sense. I damn near screamed up half a lung after half a morning wholly online and on telephone with my insurance most of the afternoon.
There are in network hospitals. Maybe (?!!!?!?) I could find covered hospitals and then, call around to find out which colorectal surgeons have privileges there. This is exactly what my insurance company recommended. Talk about ass backwards. If I could have cut the connection with my insurance and burned off the lips of their employee who kept telling me to “just” call around. Isn’t that their job!?! This is just another case where “kiss my [cancerous] ass” would have been too good for them.
So, this is where I am. No ultrasound. For now. I just have to wait. This feels really bad. I am so anxious now, I can feel my brain pounding in my chest. It’s dropped that low.
Mishl53's Blog 
You would do better to drive over your phone slowly. That way you could feel the crunch, you could even go back and forth over it a few times till it stops crunching. There is no satisfaction driving fast.
5/29/13: Dear Michelle, I’m sorry and angry that you have to deal with this run-around from your ins. co. (which one if you don’t mind me asking) just when you most need their help. I didn’t initially recommend the surgeon I had because, although I’m sure his technical expertise is excellent, I am dealing with post-op complications that are pretty common to the type of surgery I had. In case you want to check him out: Roy Breen, MD (and his partner, Dr. Mark Whiteford) are affiliated with the Oregon Clinic and Providence Hosp. Let me know if there’s any other way I can support you. Please stay hopeful and your usual feisty self (research shows that patients with chutzpah fare better!)–Love & Shalom, Sala
Michelle, this is really horrible. I am so sorry you have to go through this at all and to have your insurance company acting this way is totally awful and wrong. I am keeping you in my thoughts. you.
Hang in there! Love you! Ellen
Dearest Mishl53,
What is ur insurance company? Maybe i can help research.
Also, Maybe print colorectal surgeons that are listed with in network hospital and then give that list to Rabbi’s husband to choose from. Or when he recommends someone, check if they have priviliges at the in network hospital.
Does the insurance have more than one in network hosp in your area? Pick best rated for colorectal hosp.
Dear Leslye,
Thanks for your suggestions. I got your call. I have been busy all day. Yesterday and today. I volunteer for my shul’s cemetery committee. I sold a plot for a man who died in his sleep and found by his wife. He was one year younger than me. Today I sold another for a woman who was diagnosed with ovarian and cervical cancer three weeks ago. She died today. I guess she never had a gyn appointment in her life. Her adult kids were distraught. It was sad.
I talked to the funeral home about the cost of cremation. It is reasonable. I want to get through my oncology appointment tomorrow and then, the surgical consult on Tuesday. After that I think I will pre-purchase the cremation so, the kids don’t have to worry about it. I cannot decide whether to buy a plot (1/2 plot for cremains) or just let the kids disperse my ashes wherever they want. Oy..
I am on Medicare. Medicaid is the plan for those who have no work history or not enough money paid into the system. I have found a surgery practice that has a medical billing department that is used to working with Medicare. I am done worrying about that part.
Dearest Misl53, I have always thought of you as someone with a welcoming spirit and a core of tremendous strength. Reading what your day was like yesterday, I was impressed with your ability to maintain grace while continuing with your volunteer committment during this time.
The decisions you are thinking about are difficult…very emotional. I think you are very couragous to consider them now. I am not surprised that you would do so in an effort to alleviate the possible burden for your children since I know that your childrens’ well being is and always has been your number one priority.
XO
I will put u on a misabera list w my temple in NJ. Sorry to hear all this, but unfortunately you have to be pro active with your health concerns. Go on line to find the hospital and then the doctor affiliated w your insurance. You r stuck w the insurance so u have to work w them. They will never do anything for you. Sorry to say that, but i have had that experience.
Michelle, You are truly amazing–still doing mitzvahs for others while dealing with your own tsuris!
I’m glad that you found doctors willing to work with you and your ins. May they help you find reasons for hope–L’chaim, Sala